A different kind of post.....

 Birth. Everyone is born and Mothers are made with every birth. Each birth is so different, even if it's the same mother. Any research a mom does can affect how she gives birth. I will be making other posts detailing some of the research I have done, but I wanted to tell my birth stories to show how different each birth is, just like each baby is so vastly different. I have had 5 babies vaginally, with as few interventions as possible. Although I have not had any c-sections, I have researched them as well, and found some really interesting things about them. I will also give reasons for why I feel there are things that happened during my pregnancies and births that should not have happened and some things you may not know about "routine" procedures that are being done everyday to women and their babies. Here are my personal experiences:

Caleb, my firstborn was 2 weeks late. The induction was scheduled for the evening of January 21, 2004 at 6PM. I took Castor oil before bed on January 20th, and on the morning of the 21st I awoke at 4AM with contractions about 8 minutes apart. We started timing them, and I felt a weird pop, so I got up to go to the bathroom, where my water broke with a gush. My mom was out visiting, so we woke her up and let her know what was going on. We then proceeded to head to the hospital, as that was what we were told to do. (If I had to do it over, we would have stayed home for a while longer until I felt like I couldn't do it at home anymore. But hindsight is always 20/20, isn't it?) After arriving at the hospital I was hooked up to the monitors and checked for progression (something else I would refuse) and was at 4 cm. I started throwing up around 9AM and was checked again, 7cm. My dr showed up shortly after that and I was starting to feel overwhelmed, so I had a shot of Stadol. It took the edge off the back labor and allowed me to relax a little better between the contractions. Another couple hours passed and at around 12:30, I was complete, but had no urge to push. After another shot of Stadol, my dr "let" me try labor down for 3 hours, but it was found that Caleb's head was slightly tilted to the side and caught on my pelvis, so they tried the vacuum to get it to stay in a more favorable position. That didn't work, so they had me start pushing at 3:30PM while the vacuum was "helping". Another fail. By then it felt like contractions were one long spasm of my back muscles. So, with the help of Peter and a nurse, they helped me change positions to my hands and knees to try get Caleb to shift positions. Stayed that way for a while with no success, so we tried squatting, still not helping. By this time it was 5:30PM and I had been pushing for 2 hours with no progression, so a resident OB was called in to help. That's when the big guns came out (or rather the monstrous vice grips) and threats to do a c-section if we hadn't made any progress in half an hour. Well, then the proceeded to cut me and start pulling Caleb out with the forceps while I was pushing in a semi-sitting position. It was excruciating and something I wish we could've avoided. But it was done, and Caleb was born at 6:33PM, a half our after my induction was scheduled for and 17 hours after labor started. His head was bruised and sore, along with a blood blister from the vacuum. I had to be very careful how I held him as to not hurt his very sensitive head. My recovery was long and tough. It took a few months before I even felt somewhat "normal" again. He had times where he would scream for no apparent reason and nothing would help him settle down. We believe that his traumatic birth plays a role in his inabilities to focus and settle down. Last summer we bought a swing set and found the more he was on the swings, the better his focus! He started doing better with tantrums as well, and are so thankful for that!

Daniel was our second baby. From day 1 the pregnancy was different. I was not nearly as sick, or as big. I felt great and other than nearly failing the glucose test (I failed the 1 hour but passed the 3 hour) it was an easy pregnancy. My due date came and went and a week after my due date, I once again tried the castor oil before bed. Eight days after I was "due" I woke at 3:30AM for the nightly trip to the bathroom. As soon as I got in the bathroom, I felt the familiar pop again, and water once again came gushing all over the bathroom floor. I told Peter I was going to get in the shower and cleaned up while he called our friends who were going to have Caleb. Once in the shower, contractions started coming fast and furious. I got out and told Peter we better leave as soon as Caleb was gone. Well, the friends who were taking care of Caleb came and one wanted to keep talking to Peter while the other could tell we needed to go, so she kept telling him let's go, they need to get going... Contractions were about 2 minutes apart at that time. Once again, we ride to the hospital and get the whole questionnaire that they should've already had. Once my dr arrives, I climb on the bed to get checked out and was at 7cm already. 30 minutes later I have the unmistakable urge to push, so I did. I was on my hands and knees, dealing with back labor again, and wasn't going to move. Thankfully, they didn't force me on my back and Daniel came out with the cord wrapped around his neck screaming strongly. The dr had to cut the cord before he was all the way out because it was so tight, so Peter didn't get to do it that time. He was born at 5:57AM, May 5, 2005, just 2 1/2  hours after labor started, and I tore slightly on my episiotomy scar. Healing this time was WAY easier and a lot quicker as well. It was just a couple weeks until I felt normal. I also was able to hold him and not have to worry whether I was hurting him or not. He also had no problems with screaming episodes.

Lucas, our third child was also stubborn and 8 days "late". My sister was here for the first time and really wanted to see him before she had to leave. The morning of May 20th, I took castor oil. I went about my day as normally as one can at 41 weeks pregnant, but was feeling a little off. I couldn't quite put my finger on it, but something was definitely not the same. We got Caleb and Daniel to bed on time, and my sister was out with a friend for the evening. We were watching America's Most Wanted, and at 9:45, I felt and heard a weird pop. I got up to go to the bathroom and once again, water all over the floor. This time though, contractions did not really kick in. They were not very strong and stayed at 5 minutes apart. Peter was a little worried that things would happen quickly, so we called his brother and sister in law to stay with Caleb and Daniel until my sister got back. They all pulled in the driveway at the same time, so Peter sent his brother home. We headed to the hospital, (once again WAY too early) and was checked in. The nurse didn't believe that my water had broke so she checked with the little PH strip. I tried telling her this is my third baby and know when my water breaks. I wasn't too impressed with her. After it was confirmed that my water had broken, I was put in a labor/ delivery room, and strapped to monitors once again. And there I sat... and sat... and sat... all night long with contractions 5 minutes apart that were not really strong, just enough to keep me awake all night long. (I should have taken advantage of the fact that I wasn't sleeping and been up and walking, moving, whatever to get labor going.) At 6AM they started the Pitocin drip. Those were contractions like I'd never had before! They were so strong and unrelenting! I progressed quickly and I remember a couple times that I asked for an epidural. I had never come close to doing that before, even with Caleb's very difficult birth, so Peter knew by that that things were really tough. They checked me and I was 9cm, so they wouldn't give me one, but they did get me a shot of stadol. That was sweet relief! I was able to sleep between contractions then and once I started pushing, I was sleeping between pushes too (I was pushing on my side). Lucas was born at 10:05ish on Sunday morning of May 21st 2006. I only required one stitch and recovered quickly again, although dealt with a little more post- partum blues than I had before. (After the research we did, we think that's thanks to the Pitocin.)

Kimberly, our first daughter (and only as of now...) was born June 26th 2008. Her pregnancy was VERY different. Never before had I puked so much, or for so long. I was constantly nauseated and that lasted until my 17th week of pregnancy. I lost nearly 20 pounds in the first half of my pregnancy. I also had major heartburn and leg cramps too. I should've bought stock in Rolaids. After finally getting over the nausea, I felt great. Until 27 weeks. On March 27, 2008, I began to feel some strong contractions, 5 minutes apart. I was scared and we called my sister and her husband to stay with the boys while we went to the hospital to get checked out. I was strapped to the monitor for 3 hours and the contractions were still there, although they had lessened in strength and were barely showing on the monitor. So, they sent me home with orders to rest, drink tons of fluids, and don't lift anything over 10 pounds. I had a dr appointment 2 days later and was put on moderate bed rest. I am so thankful that Peter was able to be home as much as he was for those first few weeks! His work was slow and since he runs his business from home, was able to help out a lot. When he wasn't able to be home, he'd try to take one of the boys with him when he could, or would drop one off at his parents' house. Lucas was still taking long naps then, so I really only had one fairly self-sufficient boy at home. Then the meals from church were coming once a week, so Peter was doing a lot of cooking too. He's actually pretty good at it! :) He was also taking care of most of the cleaning, but his sister would come on Saturdays and do a more thorough job and give him a break. In April my mom was able to be here for 10 days and that was such a blessed help! It took so much pressure off Peter and he relaxed about things getting done. After mom left, a couple dear friends would come once a week and clean the house, some people from church were taking Caleb and Daniel during the day a couple times a week and we were getting meals 3 times a week from our church family. Finally at 38 weeks I was allowed to come off bedrest and although I had to take it a little easier, I was feeling pretty good and so happy to be able to care for my own kids and house again! Well, after all the drama, we thought for sure I'd be having the baby early. Wrong! My due date of June 10 came and went and on the 18th, we went in to induce. After being on Pitocin for 12 hours and only dilating to 2cm, Kimberly was still too high up to break my water, so they sent me home. They wanted to try again 3 days later, but I told them that was not going to happen. They were a little miffed, but I was not going to show up until at least a week later to try again. During that week, I was taking Evening primrose oil to soften my cervix, Red Raspberry Leaf tea to make my uterus contract more efficiently, and also tried castor oil 4 times. Labor never started on it's own and I went in for another attempt at a pitocin induction on the evening of the 25th. At around 1AM they started the drip and I woke up to strong contractions at 5AM. I had made the mistake of accepting an Ambien when they started the drip so I was pretty groggy until around 9AM. Peter got a service call at 8AM and left until 12. I was not happy that he was gone, but tried not to focus on that and just relaxed as best I could through and between contractions. My doctor was notified when I was unable to talk through contractions anymore and at 1:30 they broke my water. Again, something I won't let them do again. Once my water was broke, I got off the bed as the back labor got really hard to deal with. (Before my water was broken, I made sure to keep moving, either standing at the side of the bed, pacing the floor, or rocking in the chair. I had asked the nurses to kind of leave me alone, and they did. They were always encouraging when they came in, but that was only to up the pit.) It was only a few minutes of standing at the side of the bed again and my doctor could tell things were moving fast. Peter was also aware of things kicking in as he kept asking if I wanted something for the pain... I almost smacked him for that. lol 10 minutes after they broke my water the doctor wanted to check how far I was. I managed to climb on the bed on my hands and knees and that's as far as I got. Kimberly was coming NOW! She was born at 1:48PM barely 20 minutes after my water broke. I had a couple skid marks, but required no stitching YAY! My recovery was so easy physically, but emotionally a long difficult road. I suffered from PPD in a big way, requiring me to go on medication for a few months. I got good at pretending everything was great! Why wouldn't it have been? I had a healthy, beautiful daughter and we were doing well... I felt like people would not understand what the big deal was, so I kept quiet. Until now. We also found that my thyroid was way off and after researching the affects of having a whacko thyroid on pregnancy, contribute the early contractions and some of the depression issues to that. We also believe that Pitocin was a co-contributor. My thyroid issue took a while to figure out as my numbers were all over the place. I have since been diagnosed with Hashtimotos syndrome which is an autoimmune disorder that kills the thyroid. After Kimberly's birth I have done a ton of research on birth options and the safety of "routine" procedures, and benefits of other not so commonly done ones. What I have found has both shocked and amazed me. I encourage everyone, pregnant, not pregnant, thinking of becoming pregnant to do the research. I watched videos, read books, read study data and talked to other experienced moms of their experiences. I love reading birth stories, especially of home or unmedicated births. The information out there is plentiful and there for the gleaning.

Our youngest baby Matthew has a completely different story. I do have it already posted here, but in not so much detail. My pregnancy with him was fairly typical. I wasn't very nauseated, and felt pretty good, just extremely tired. The trouble with this pregnancy was the doctor. The doctor I had with my other kids was no longer in family practice and was not taking patients as he is now in urgent care. I was really bummed about that as he was pretty good. The first doctor I had with Matthew was not a good fit. He was patronizing and said he wouldn't "let" me go past 41 weeks, even after reviewing my chart and seeing I had always gone past 41 weeks. That was the first red flag. But I still kept seeing him until I was 21 weeks and went over my birth plan with him. He laughed at me a couple times and since Peter was with me, he saw what I had been trying to tell him. I started really thinking about home birth then and even interviewed a midwife. (If the next doctor was another poor choice, we would have definitely gone that route.) The next day I switched to another doctor. Much better! He was excited about my birth plan and told me that nurses don't always like him much because he will tell them to wait to do certain procedures and doesn't let them even suction a baby unless there were traces of meconium in the water. I felt I had met the right one for the job. He was so easy going and I loved the fact that he understood I wasn't stupid and knew what I was talking about. We did have a slight issue at 35 weeks when I had stupidly agreed to an ultrasound which showed Matthew to be 7lb5oz already and he started talking induction. I was very upset as he had before assured me that unless there was a medical indication, we would not go down that road, and big babies were not a medical indication. I took a week to think about my options before talking to him about it, and when we did talk about it, he was very understanding about where I was coming from and said there were certain standards that he had to live up to, while rolling his eyes about it. He really doesn't understand why those standards are the way they are, but explained it this way. "Something goes wrong only 5% of the time. To avoid getting sued, most doctors want to prevent that 5% so they subject the other 95% of women to interventions to try avoid something going wrong." He does not believe that to be the right thing to do. And when I asked him about home birth, he said this "I would love to attend one, but if my malpractice insurance found out, I would no longer be allowed to practice medicine." He also had this weird thing he'd keep bringing up me having my baby in a McDonalds parking lot... don't ask why, because I am not sure what that was about. Anyway, once we got all that straightened around, we were all good. At 30 weeks I made a trip up to Edmonton to visit family with the kids. It had been 4 years, and was a great time! My sister came home with me and was staying here when Matthew was born. You'll see why that was such a good thing a little farther down. :) At 36 weeks I was dilated to 2cm and he gave me his personal cell # just in case things took off in a hurry. At my 40 week appointment I had progressed to 3cm. I made it to 9 days over due and went to the Secret Pal party at church. I had been having the occasional night with what turned out to be false labor, and was having contractions at the party too, but figured that was the same annoying false labor again. I headed for home around 9 when things were done at the party and still had contractions 6 minutes apart for another 3 hours. At midnight everything stopped cold. I slept on the couch for an hour while my sister was watching old MASH episodes on DVD and at 1:30 I got up and headed for bed figuring it was just another bout of false labor. At 1:45 I had one long, strong contraction and felt a pop, so I jumped (as well as anyone as huge as I was could jump) out of bed and felt the gush once more. I hopped in the shower and told Peter to let the dr. know. After being in the shower a few minutes, contractions were really kicking in (once again, hello back labor) and I felt the symptoms of transition. Shaking, hot, cold, hot, cold, and thinking this is it! I kept getting out of the shower to use the toilet and back to the shower again. I eventually forced myself to get dressed and told Peter we've gotta leave NOW! He already figured that much when my water broke and told the dr right away that we're headed in and got the truck ready to go. That ride was the worst EVER and I had to fight the natural urge to push the whole way there. When we finally got there, I went from the truck to the wheelchair because I knew if I tried walking to the floor, the baby would be born in the hallway or elevator. I felt Matthew decent really quickly and by the time we got to the delivery room (after answering stupid questions at the nurses' station about my insurance), Matthew was starting to crown. Peter helped get me undressed and Matthew just slipped out into the nurses' hands at 2:26AM. I had to bend my knees a little to get his shoulders out, but no pushing on my part at all. After Matthew was born the nurses commented on how big he was and I thought yeah, ok, about 10 pounds like Caleb was... I was helped on the bed so I could hold and nurse him, and I was also the first one to check whether he was a boy or girl. I kept saying "He's a him, he's a him!" while Peter and the nurses were chuckling at me. We got our bonding time and I nursed Matthew right away and waited for the placenta while we did that. While Matthew was nursing, my doctor finally showed up with a huge grin on his face and the first words were, "See? You could've done it in a McDonald's parking lot... you don't need nurses and doctors to birth babies!" I just laughed and shook my head. They got the cord clamped and cut (it had finished pulsating and was white and limp) and took Matthew to weigh and measure him and I delivered the placenta. They said that Matthew was 10lb 13oz and I was shocked! Then Dr tells me that I had no tears, or even skid marks! YEA! I was shocked on both and asked Peter "How the world did I not tear!?" We also got to watch as the Dr looked at the placenta. It was really interesting (Yeah, I enjoyed Biology :) ) to see how it worked and what it looked like. The organ that had supplied life giving nutrients and oxygen to my baby for the last 9+ months. Really amazing. My recovery was so minimal it was crazy. An hour after birth I was in the shower, feeling like I did any other morning. I told Peter that had I not had a baby in my arms, I would never believe I had just given birth. I felt AWESOME! I returned home that same day, just 16 hours after Matthew was born. It was so great to be in my own bed! I was tired, but felt great otherwise. We are now just over 2 months postpartum and doing tremendously! Matthew has started to sleep through the night, (although not EVERY night, but he does 6 hours on the nights he doesn't, so he's up at 4AM) and he's growing way too quickly for my liking. The other kids absolutely adore him and love to get him to smile for them.